Hey there, friend—

There’s a shared theme happening amongst a lot of people right now, and that is the eerie and unsettling sense that they’ve somehow lost their purpose, their identity, and their path.

​The undercurrent of 2023 has been laden with sudden loss, unexpected change, and inexplicable redirects that feel more like we’re taking several steps backward.

​Not all of these changes are negative. In fact, many of these changes can be exciting—and, for those who are being hit with loss and a lot of completion energy, it can be incredibly destabilizing.

​While there’s much happening energetically and cosmically that’s contributing to this perplexing time, the biggest question for those who are living through their own dark night of the soul…

“Who am I and what am I supposed I do?”

A woman I spoke with last week feels like she doesn’t know who she is anymore, and it’s causing her to doubt both—her marriage and what she does for work. She’s stopped entertaining friends in her home and declines most social invitations, because she isn’t being and doing what she once was.

​A younger woman whose had a successful and exciting career in fashion until 6 months ago is suddenly not feeling fulfilled and she doesn’t understand why. She has turned her fear and lack of direction to over-drinking and having casual affairs because she can’t handle the internal chaos she feels.

​A woman my age recently lost her husband to cancer and is now questioning what she’s meant to do with her life, now that she’s alone. She feels lost and without purpose. Her future seems desolate and possibly not worth living for.

​When I was considering separation from my (now ex) husband—and again after we called it quits—I went through a similar period of “who am I and what do I do now?”

​I’m often asked how I built resilience during these times of massive uncertainty. For some reason, that word has always felt wrong in this context.

​The definition of resilience is “the ability of a person to adjust or recover readily from adversity, major life changes”, and “to return to its original form or position after being bent, compressed or stretched”.

The truth is—we don’t bounce back from big life events, nor do we ever return to our original form or position because we have been transformed by the experience.

​Change is something that can go back and forth. You can change your outfit, your hair style, your job, relationship, or where you live.

​Transformation, on the other hand, cannot be undone. You cannot return a freshly baked dish of brownies back into its original form of eggs, butter, sugar, and flour.

Big life events transform who we are from the inside out.

​My mantra during these unimaginably trying times was (and continues to be) “Who am I becoming in the process?”

This mantra is what kept me accountable to myself, the Universe, and my Creator while I was in my own dark night of the soul.

​To this day, it keeps me anchored to my inner knowingness that the deeper work is in making everyday choices that lead to greater health and personal growth—spiritually, energetically, mentally, emotionally, and physically.

​When you can’t see the path in front of you and you no longer trust yourself to make the right choices, ask these questions, and let your life be guided by your Higher Self, your Guides, and your God.

    • What can I do today—even if it’s just one thing—that will help to cultivate greater health and personal growth?
    • How can I stay in my own lane (refrain from being a victim and blaming others) and tend to my inner work—regardless of the circumstances?
    • Who am I becoming in the process (alternatively, who do I want to become in the process)?

While it may seem like you are lost, you are always being Divinely guided on your path. This is where I am reminded of the poem called, “Footprints in the Sand”.

​Allow the people, the places, and the things to fall away—and let them go with love and gratitude. It’s okay to also let go of old parts of yourself, for this is part of your transformation.

When we feel lost, it’s because we don’t recognize ourselves or our surroundings. This is can feel frightening, for sure. And yet, you’re not lost—you’re transforming. You’re becoming the next version of yourself–and that’s something to get excited about.

There may be a period of grieving and healing for you to process, and while it may be uncomfortable for some time, this is where the light enters and prepares you for your next chapter.

​If you’re already in your wildly exciting new beginning—enjoy the ride—and keep in mind that there are likely others in your life who are still in the dark.

May your light shine brightly on the path of those who walk in darkness, and may your darkness transform you into the next—and best—expression of who you came here to be.

​In the meantime, be humble, be kind, and love one another.

Always Be Rising,