Hey there, friend—

This week on the path, I’m shining a light on finding ourselves and our center when life is dishing some mighty challenges.

Many of us feel the desperate need to change other people or our circumstances when things aren’t working out according to our plan.

This stems from our core wounds which are being triggered anytime our sense of safety and security are threatened.

Things can (and often do) go sideways very quickly in life.

When this happens, life seems to go from really good to really bad so fast that we have trouble understanding what is happening, why it’s happening, and how best to handle the situation as it’s happening.

It’s in these tense times that we can really spin out. And when we’re spinning, we’re unable to respond in productive ways.

It’s precisely in these chaotic times in our lives that we need to ground ourselves and take a very measured approach to how we’re thinking, what we’re choosing, and how we’re showing up.

I’ve said before that our emotions are the #1 thing that can (and will) derail us in our life and on our path.

The quality of our lives is determined by the quality of our emotions. If we want to level up our lives, we need to level up the quality of our emotions.

What we think, what we feel, and what we do is what ultimately produces the results that we really want. On the flip side, our thoughts, feelings, and actions also have the power to produce outcomes we really DON’T want.

Before I separated from my (now ex) husband, it was pretty clear that shit had definitely gone sideways. I knew he was having an affair with a young girl who worked for us, and I can tell you for certain that had me spinning so hard and fast I could barely function.

What I knew was that I needed to remove myself from the environment—to put some time and distance between us—so that I could get a better handle on myself.

I knew what I was feeling was a natural and normal emotional response to what was happening in my then-marriage. And, when I really sat with what was coming up, I knew my childhood wounds of feeling abandoned and unwanted were just as much the culprit of my spinning as was the shock, anger, and confusion of what was actually unfolding in my life at that time.

Finding your true self in the space between the discord of your past and the mess in the moment is some seriously tricky business. It was, by far, the hardest assignment I’d been given in my life, to date.

While I’m not stoked I had to experience this, there’s no doubt I needed it in order to become the version of myself that I am today.

I leveled up my own personal growth and spiritual development, and the work I do with others today is so much richer and deeper because of it.

Whenever you’re faced with some massive upheaval in your life, it’s important to focus all your energy and attention on regulating your emotions so that you have better state control and can make important decisions from a calm, centered and congruent place.

My guess is you’ve likely found yourself in some big life events that really spun you out. Perhaps you’re in some version of it—or you know someone else who is fighting their way through it right now.

In these times, you must choose yourself first and foremost.

The things that worked best for me when I was really spinning—

  • Breathe slowly and deeply as often as possible
  • Do walking meditations in nature
  • Cry often and let the energy of emotion move through you
  • Eat super clean and avoid alcohol (definitely avoid alcohol)
  • Find a healthy hobby (mine was learning to fly)
  • Practice forgiveness toward yourself and others (hard as it may be)
  • Work with the mantra, “Who am I becoming in this process?” 

These practices will help you feel more calm, centered, and balanced
, and they will support you in regulating your energy, mindset, and emotions.

It won’t happen overnight—and, it’s the medicine that will heal you in time.


Always Be Rising,